Have you ever had an a-ha moment in life where you’re able to look at something with picture perfect clarity and make the right decisions without needing to go through the pain and drama?
Or are you like me, who, despite being told that the stove will burn my hand,
actually needs to touch it to learn?
I want to become someone who is good at learning from other people’s mistakes. I want to gain the wisdom of being able to listen to someone whose authority and own wisdom gives them the right to caution me before I get burned.
I think I’m slowly learning this. In my twenties I really struggled with taking advice, I felt (and sometimes still feel) that advice was somehow an indicator of the fact that I hadn’t already thought of that option myself; that somehow my intelligence or instincts were “off” somehow by taking their advice.
I still struggle sometimes, but I’m really starting to learn to trust those around me.
It’s not that my gut, my head, my heart isn’t smart enough; its that sometimes they’re wrong. And the beauty of doing life with people is that when your blinkers are in the way, they have your back and flank.
As I enter my second year in my 30s I feel like I’m starting to come to a better understanding on what community is for. When my husband cautions me about not trusting certain people it doesn’t mean I should write them off, it means I should be careful and not rush in blindly to give them a space of any authority in my world before they earn the trust.
I’ve really learned that the best way to love your life is to be surrounded by people who also love your life. People who are truly invested in seeing you grow, learn, thrive and find joy in the world you inhabit. People who want peace, joy, truth and love for you. That means people with agendas need not be a part of it. That means being able to trust your mother or partner when they identify trouble spots that for whatever reason, you override and allow to cause grief.
I’m loving my life hard because I think for the first time in my entire life, I don’t have a single person close to me who brings doubt. I think I’m finally surrounded (and by that I mean metaphorically, because you’re all over the world now) by people who truly love me, have no agenda, accept me 100%, don’t need me to change to have a successful relationship with me. I have no one who talks about me behind my back, that also gets to talk to my face.
And for once, I feel freedom in the fact that I am truly loved. No one is going to stab me in the back. No one is going to manipulate me or explode at me because I don’t fit into their ideals of who I should be.
I’m burn free.. And despite a few touches of the stove in the past, I’m happy to allow others to help me in my kitchen, so to speak.
Thank you. You know who you are.
And thank you to those who didn’t make the cut. I’m so very happy without you! ❤️